Still primal

Soooo cavegirls didn't drink wine -dammit!  I'll tell you something else, they don't like Crown Prince Albert  squash despite what Hugh Weirdly Eatitall says about them. He was waxing lyrical about their sumptuous taste and their beautiful blue colour and all I can say is bleurgh!  I thought I was being so clever - had an impressive meal planned for a boy (yes... a male one, who had been enticed into my cave) which was going to be lamb chop, curried leek and kale in coconut milk, and mashed Crown Prince Albert squash.  

 The squash was not a success, bland, dull, insipid, tasteless.....you get the picture.  Bit embarrassing after I'd made such a fuss about this exotic blue squash that we were going to have for dinner *sigh*.
  And it's not me just being a fussy thing - squash hasn't fared well in the opinions of the paleo facebook group either - in fact the reactions have varied from "it's going in the compost" to "sod them, they can bugger off".  ( I did try again and made spicy roast acorn squash today and it is actually really yummy so I think I'm going to persist with the squash but only roasted with lots of crushed cumin, coriander seed and chilli - and that's all I shall say about that!)
Crossfit has persisted in leaving me in a semi- paralysed state - 60 pistol squats....on EACH leg - seriously - how the hell are you supposed to get home after that??  That was in addition to a warm up of 50 press ups and 50 squats - scaled muscle ups and pushpresses.  So couldn't use my arms either!  The painball certainly came out after THAT session.
I had intended to be strictly primal this week but I have a friend who thinks it's funny to hide Lindt chocolate bars around my flat - and as I have the breaking strain of a soggy kitkat I "may" have eaten a fair bit - hey I'm supposed to be hunter-gathering right??
Apart from the chocolate fail I have been pretty good.  Now that I'm half way through I can share some of the things I have learnt along the way.  You CAN eat too many roast parsnips, squash only tastes good if you roast it with lots of spices, it's amazing how many eggs you can get through in a week,  Becky may be built on bacon but I'm fueled by chorizo,  I haven't yet got bored of roast chicken, Nando's is my friend.  I have found the facebook support page invaluable for inspiration (thank you Cathie, Becky, Jules and Cherie in particular) - I LOVE huevos rancheros, and my slow cooker is a godsend.  The only thing I still crave is chocolate (and occasionally martinis).

I have noticed that while the weight hasn't dropped off as I had hoped - I am slowly getting less wide and my double chin is receding.  And while I'm not bouncing around like Tigger with energy I have stopped needing to take an afternoon nap when I'm "working from home".  I have managed 3 crossfit sessions this week (which is a first for quite a while) and while I'm aching I'm not crawling along the floor begging for mercy.  I managed PBs on back squats, shoulder presses and deadlifts today and have gone down to a green band for my pull ups.  After 3 weeks I think I can safely say that despite my initial scepticism I am enjoying being primal - I am eating more vegetables than I had ever though possible and am taking pleasure in finding new and interesting things to cook.  I quite like being a cavegirl (as long as she can occasionally get upside down drunk without being squashed by a woolly mammoth)

Going loco....

Yup - who'd have thought that I would wander into M&S and pass the chocolate and biscuits aisles without a sidelong glance and go straight to pick up lamb koftas and a little pack of fruit and nuts!   I have a Nando's loyalty card and a vegetable rack brimming with, well er... loads of vegetables.   I have to admit that squash week was a little bit of a disaster.  I had it all planned - I was going to buy lots of different and exotic squash, cook them in clever and innovative ways and then write it all up here to show what a clever little cavegirl I was.  It all started so well when my sister and I wandered past Reg theVeg in Clifton village and noticed a big basket of different and exotic squash(es?)  A lovely French lady then talked to us about the different types - I particularly wanted spaghetti squash as I wanted to try to make paleo spag bol.  Luckily they had one, they also had a Crown Prince Albert  squash about which the lady waxed lyrical so I bought that too - my sis bought 2 little acorn squash(es?) for the kids as we had been told you could eat them for dessert - roasted and sprinkled with sugar and cinnamon.  So far so good - I also had a butternut squash at home that I was going to spicy roast and make into frittata with some chorizo for my sailing weekend.

The spaghetti squash was easy - stab it a couple of times with a knife (or a fork) and bung it in the oven about 180degrees C and leave for 40mins to an hour - (but DON'T let it roll to the back of the oven and get jammed between the shelf and the oven wall so it burns and fills the flat with a putrid smell!).  Luckily I noticed before it was too late (I just cut the burnt bit off later).  I was supposed to be cooking a meal for a couple of mates that night so bought a roast chicken and had that with the spaghetti squash fried up in butter with bacon bits and kale. (Once the squash is cooked -cut it in half, scoop out the seeds and with a fork pull out the squash flesh from the skin - it goes into strings like spaghetti - hurrah!)  Next time I would use some stronger flavours such as garlic but I was cooking for a fussy boy who doesn't like it.
The frittata was awesome and a very welcome alternative to the sandwiches, pies, pasties and sausage rolls that tend to get eaten on the boat while we're sailing.  It was a hell of a weekend - top end  gale force 8 as we struggled towards Southampton for a party.  It took 2 hours for my hands to defrost and I was very grateful for my first glass of wine in about 2 weeks.  Unfortunately I didn't manage to stick to 1 glass and although I managed to eat as clean as I could during the crew chinese meal I did seem to inhale the best part of 2 bottles of wine!
Despite feeling quite special (and f*&^ing freezing) in the morning I avoided the bacon sarnie and ate some chorizo instead but couldn't resist yorkshire pudding with my Sunday roast.  By the time we had delivered the boats back, sorted out everyone's kit it was late and we were all knackered - I still managed to turn down the offer of a Burger King on the way home but had a small chocolate bear and M&S pad thai for dinner as I hadn't prepared for Sunday night (doh!).
I have to admit that  the scales have been a little cruel to me post  the weekend but I have knuckled down and got primal again.

squats or squash (your choice)

Sandwich - what kind of a name is that for a WOD for people who aren't allowed bread?? I dreeeeeeeem of sandwiches but after that session - not anymore (......ah now I see the logic!!)  800m row (achilles too sore for the run), 21,15,9 wall balls (3kg) and american swings 16kg, 800m row.   Finally just cos he could, Andrew finished us all off (literally!) with a team 2500m row (500m each) bleurgh.  Unfortunately my overenthusiastic hip thrusting (probably without engaging my core sufficiently) during the swings did something horrid to my back- so back to the physio for me!
I failed at the first hurdle in apple rolling (again literally) - apple was too big and not round enough (note for next year!) so it wouldn't go under the apple limbo bar. I scampered lumbered off with my tail between my legs to put a heat back on my back.

Now it's at this stage that all the primal beings out there will be squawking about sitting - apparently spine wizards osteopaths will tell you that sitting is to your spine what sugar is to your teeth (or in fact your tummy).  Mobility WOD had plenty of posts on squatting and there's a rather amusing video on You Tube for any of my time-rich friends regarding the advantages of squatting over sitting.  Moral of the story - must squat more.  OK I get it! (and I might even don the fetching attire seen in the photo!)

Was a good cavegirl for the rest of the day despite being tempted to rip the hands off anyone I saw holding pastry (obviously cured of my sandwich addiction since the morning) and made some more submlime moroccan tomato stew.
Had some epic minor fails over the next few days by succumbing to dark chocolate and a couple of martinis when a friend came to visit on Sunday evening although I also made an amazing kick ass slow cooked pork shoulder with ginger and apple along with Jamie Oliver's spicy roast butternutsquash.  More moroccan eggs for brekkie with the rest of the spring greens followed by an unpleasant trip to the physio.  Went to St Nick's market to the new Grillstock food store (perfect for salivating caveboys and girls) and had their pulled pork and coleslaw bun without the bun  (almost as good as mine but not quite) and then proper steak from the lovely butchers at Ruby and White with asparagus and bearnaise sauce for tea.

Apart from the chocolate I'm on a roll (mmmm bread!) so had bacon, eggs, courgette fritters, asparagus and bearnaise sauce for brekkie and Chorizo and salad for lunch.  I've been sagely following the advice of coach Andrew to concentrate on eating  more green stuff rather than trying to find grain free alternatives to pancakes and muffins and bread and cake and... ok I'm going to stop now. Minor problem is that I'm not a great fan of green stuff so I set about searching for some recipes that might encourage me or give me inspiration.   Hugh Weirdly-Eatitall's book Veg every day has a few paleo recipes but a curried leek and kale recipe (cooked with coconut milk) particularly appealed especially when I thought I could add some diced bacon.  Et voila - supper of leftover slowcooked pork, leftover squash and some super yummy curried leek and kale with bacon - stuffed!

As it's coming up for Hallowe'en I feel slightly obliged to start mining the squash mountain.  Also I have to admit to still missing the idea or maybe the texture of carb side dishes.  Unfortunately I can't bring myself to eat cauliflower *hiss* devil's food -which can be mashed to make faux rice but I've seen recipes involving spaghetti squash and mashed pumpkin that might kid my brain into believing pasta and mashed potato. I saw some cute teeny pumkins in the supermarket so I shall get one and see how I go (it may get boring as I may well get ever so slightly obsessed for a week)

Cavegirls definitely had boobs

If I haven't lost weight after a week doing this I shall be bloody very pissed off annoyed!!!  I think I'm going to have to stay indoors for a week as I still haven't got over my cravings for sweet things, but at least I have no posh dinners next week although I think I can't avoid socialising totally.  I shall just have to hope that people don't notice my diet or are sympathetic to my  wish need to lose some lard.  As I'm allowed to eat healthy fat I'm hoping that losing weight won't involve losing my boobs (I know there are some of my friends who have been very concerned about that aspect!)  and it sure beats some of the crazier ideas I've heard about (apparently rowers swear by ambrosia rice pudding - which isn't paleo and is in any event the food of the devil!)
I'm amazingly thirsty considering the amount of water I've got down my neck in the last 48 hours while everyone around me has been drinking champagne and wine, but I'm hoping that is just my body's need to flush out fat or toxins or whatever it is and that when I step on the scales on Tuesday that I don't have to throw them out the window!

Had bacon, scrambled egg and broccoli for breakfast and a huge chicken and roasted artichoke and avocado salad for lunch.  I have a recipe for moroccan stew to make up for this evening, which you can then cook with eggs to make a spicy breakfast like huevos rancheros - but I will have some of it tonight with steamed broccoli and asparagus and whatever meat I have in the freezer and then have it with eggs and bacon (or chorizo) tomorrow morning after cross fit and before I go apple rolling.

I am going to make some more courgette fritters to take with me sailing on sunday with some beef jerky and hard boiled eggs plus a small tub of almond butter to eat with an apple (hopefully a world champion apple) -well that's the plan - we'll see if it works out!
I have to admit that despite all my moaning I haven't been hungry yet, but I do feel lethargic (although that's actually nothing new!)  I am desperately trying to get myself to the gym for a swim cos my ankle is killing me but I may just end up doing a session with the pain ball and try and do some mobility WOD stuff as I could do with working on my achilles, feet, and shoulders.

Postscript:
I was a little scared to weigh myself because if I hadn't lost weight I was really going to struggle to keep going with paleo, but I also needed a bit of encouragement to keep at it so I bit the bullet and stood on the scales of death.  I have lost 2.75 lbs since Tuesday so less than a week.  I haven't yet broken the 12 stone barrier but I am hoping that by next Saturday I will have done that.  I guess I shall just have to take this a week at a time and see how I go until it becomes easier or more natural.  At the moment I'm still gazing wistfully at every cake that I see and I nearly walked into a lampost as I rubbernecked a bottle of wine in a pub window yesterday (I'm just glad I don't have a telly so I'm not constantly bombarded with adverts for fast and sweet food).  Hopefully I will get over this phase soon and I will be swooning over cavolo nero and tenderstem broccoli instead (sorry that was said with my tongue inserted so far into my cheek that I couldn't breathe!)

cavemen didn't wear blacktie

Days 3 and 4 of the challenge have been difficult because they required me to head to 2 posh work dinners.  I couldn't drag myself to cross fit on Wednesday morning because I ached all over and slept terribly.  I made myself a fab breakfast of bacon, brocolli and bearnaise sauce and hopped on the train to go and see my mate Woodsy before going to my first black tie dinner of the week.  I had briefed her on my weird diet and I was rewarded with pesto chicken, and salad - I must buy balsamic vinegar as it really made the salad taste lovely - I even ate cucumber which is one of the foods of the devil!

After lots of chat I realised I was late so bunged on some lippy and a frock and skipped down to Richmond to get the train to Waterloo.  It's funny but in London no one bats an eyelid at people in black tie on public transport (even if they are cavegirls in disguise).  I had hoped to time it so I missed the drinks reception (less temptation) but had to wait around for half an hour drinking fizzy water while everyone drank champagne (I think people thought I was either ill or pregant!)  The dinner was in the London Film Museum and there was a caveman film showing on the wall (yaaay).
I cheated a little because the starter was baked fig with mozarella (shall have to go dairy free in a couple of days) and then we had a huge wodge of overcooked beef with 4 julienne sticks of carrot and potato dauphinoise (my absolute favourite :-()  I gave it immediately to my neighbour to avoid accidental hoovering and while cursing under my beath vowed that I would eat dessert.  Actually dessert was 3 tiny bits of mango and chocolate mousse - I ate two spoonfuls and then stopped a) because I felt guilty and b) it was toooo sweet.  Dinner was uber dull especially without the lubrication of alcohol.  So I scampered off as soon as possible to get the last train back to Bristol - got to bed at 2 with a massive headache.
Day 4 and I woke at 10 (paleo says to wake without an alarm clock :-D )   went off to get eggs but as it was so close to lunch I had spicy roast chicken thighs and salad with roast artichokes and pinenuts instead of bacon etc.   I was planning for the next day's breakfast and lunch on the move and was looking at having hardboiled eggs, chicken breasts and salad - in the end my trip to leicester got cancelled so I might look at one of these cool soup recipes; spiced pumpkin or creamy tomato.  As I had homework for running club I went out in the rain (yes you read that right!) to do my 5 x 5 minute runs, picking up my knees and flicking my heels - managed 2 x3 and 2 x2 and 1x5 minutes and despite being cheered on by some welsh workmen, gave up because my left ankle was hurting (yeah I know I'm the excuses queen).  Weird because it's usually my right achilles that hurts but it's the inside of my left ankle.   Got the pain ball out and did some stretches and some massage which was excrutiating and went to shower and get ready for black tie dinner number two *sigh*. I had eaten a naked bar earlier and a handful of nuts/fruit/seeds so I baked 2 figs and then grilled them with some stichelton to keep hunger at bay.  Got a cab because it was hard to walk in the heels (and it was raining) - again timed to arrive after the drinks reception and straight into dinner.   I had tried to play it safe by asking for a wheat free, gluten free, dairy free meal so got melon and strawberries to start rather than mushroom ravioli (hate mushrooms - food of the devil) and some beautifully cooked lamb with roasted root vegetables and boiled potatoes rather than the mash that my neighbour got (he also got my potatoes).  The wine was (unusually for these gigs) pretty good stuff so I was gnashing my teeth as I drank tap water with some strawberries (?) floating in it.  Desert for me was sorbet compared with a rather lovely looking lemon tart (food of the angels).  I ate a few spoonfulls but it was sweet so I gave it to my neighbour in exchange for a sip of his wine.  I also caved in a stole two chocolate truffles and ate some grapes and cheese with a sip of dessert wine.  I left as soon as possible after encouraging everyone to come to the world apple rolling championships on Saturday and nicked an unopened bottle of red that no one wanted ;-) (it's amazing what you can fit in a little evening bag when you really want to).  (Ankle still hurts :-( )

got my measure!

I dreamt about roast chicken last night - with crispy spicy skin, mmmm....Sorry I'm not going to go all Freudian on you (and I expect my ruder friends are spitting out their coffee at this moment!)  I have weighed and measured myself so I can see whether the change in lifestyle is making any difference (I've drawn the line at photos to avoid sending small children screaming from the room).
I had a lovely breakfast of bacon and poached eggs with asparagus and courgette fritters and then had a look for recipes for mayo and hollandaise sauce as I'm pretty sure they must be paleo.

For those who fancy learning a bit about paleo, here are some videos by the lovely Andrew from Crossfit Avon, explaining the basis of the lifestyle.
I scampered down to crossfit armed with lots of water and a naked bar.  Andrew was on good form after his trip away to Barcelona and set us off warming up with kettlebells and a weird one legged deadlift which really targets your but (when you aren't wobbling or falling over.....it's all in the core).  Then we did some kipping practice - for those who aren't clear - kipping is a movement to generate momentum to help make pull ups easier (that's the theory but I just look like I'm having an epileptic fit).
Today's session wasn't helped by the fact that I was being a biff and almost managed to miss the bar when I went to do pull ups and then did manage to get the band stuck between my legs - so elegant and not altogether comfortable! ( I'm blaming the sugar DT's).  The trick requires a strong core so you get to work on the muffin top without even realising it.  I gave up with the band and just practiced swinging on the bar - I'll get it one day!
Then we practiced squat cleans, still got a problem with wrist stength and allowing the bar to rest on my shoulders (again rude friends watch out for coffee!), but was very much helped with the technique by Andrew's suggestion to imagine killing pixies with our elbows.......??!!!
Elizabeth is a WOD requiring 21,15,9 squat cleans and ring dips.  RX for women is 40kg - I managed 22.5 and boy that was hard, especially trying to get onto a band for the dips afterwards (more epileptic fitting!).  Finished in 10:58 and wanted to throw up. Of course, luckily, today was also the first day of the 8 week zero to hero running club at Moti run by the lovely Nina Killick so by the end of that session of high knees and heel flicks and sprints (sprint may be an overstatement as several small toddlers passed me) I was crawling on my knees and my arms, butt and abs were screaming. 
I had a naked bar after Crossfit and then a chicken breast and salad with avocado oil mid afternoon.  Dinner was the rest of the steak from yesterday and broccoli.

 I haven't learned to love broccoli so I made  bearnaise sauce to bring on the love and..... because I could. It was yummy and I have enough to go with asparagus and bacon and courgette fritters tomorrow - no eggs because I used the yolks for the bearnaise, although I could always try and make my first ever egg white omelette (very LA ;-) )

ugh - day one as a cavegirl

So day 1- and I woke up with a carb hangover after a mahoosive yorkshire pudding and beef sunday lunch and pizza for dinner.  It's always difficult to eat healthily when you're away from home and travelling by train and unfortunately the paleo thing just adds another dimension of difficulty, but I had planned ahead and bought some chicken breasts and avocados - so until 5pm I consumed 2 chicken breasts and an avocado.  While I like both those things I was feeling a bit sorry for myself by the time I got home so I cheated a bit and ate some little sweet chilli peppers stuffed with cheese that were in the fridge and a chocolate orange naked bar.
 I have been doing a bit of research and found a website called paleo plan which has loads of paleo recipes and because I bought an industrial quantity of courgettes last week I decided on the paleo courgette fritter recipe using coconut flour instead of grain flour.

It's blindingly simple (might be mixing my metaphors a little there) grate 2 or3 courgettes, mix 1tbs coconut flour and 3 eggs into a batter and mix in the courgettes - fry blobs of the mixture in coconut oil to make fritters. They are truly yummy and I had mine with some steak and asparagus.  It's important to sprinkle salt on the grated courgette and leave it in a sieve for about 20 minutes - then squeeze it to remove the excess water (you'll be surprised how much comes out) or you'll get soggy fritters.  I always like a bit of spice so I added lots of pepper, some chilli flakes and some ground cumin ( you could add pretty much any herbs and spices - I reckon they would be nice with mint or chopped spring onions.) I am saving the rest for brekkie tomorrow with bacon and poached eggs.  These are going to be a staple for the next couple of days but I'm pretty sure I'll get bored of them before the 6 weeks is up!  So I shall have to keep experimenting so I don't fall off the wagon - luckily I have now downloaded the kindle books I bought so I shall have an interesting few days trawling through paleo recipes to find ones I like that don't involve cauliflower, beetroot or mushrooms :-)

desperate measures....becoming a cavewoman

So I've managed to shift a bit of lard but not nearly enough - still got a stone to get back down to pre-whale weight and then it would be nice to shift another half a stone to get back to a size that can sizzle in "that" green dress.  I know that diet has more effect than exercise and I know that my diet is dirty. 

 All the fitties go on about eating clean and I just don't.   The crossfit gang all bang on about paleo and I have to admit to being pretty cynical about these fad diets (or lifestyles as this one prefers to dub itself) but as the crossfit avon box is starting a 6 week paleo challenge on Sunday I thought I might indulge in desperate measures.

For those who don't know the paleo lifestyle involves eating like paleolithic man (or woman) ie: before agriculture so no dairy or grains including pulses (or chocolate or booze more's the pity!).
 On the face of it it has to be the most miserable diet on the planet, but I've been reading some interesting stuff about insulin and carbohydrates and I know that low GI is the way ahead, but being an all or nothing girl I thought that 6 weeks wouldn't kill me and it might at least break my sugar addiction.  So bring on the meat, fish, eggs, veg and sweet potato.
I'm most worried about brekkie but as I love bacon and eggs I guess I just have to learn to live without the bagel or the muffin or simply to embrace avocado and berries in the morning

I may cheat and go with dairy if it all gets too dreadful as some of the paleo sites seem to allow it but for now I've cleared out the fridge and the freezer of all most banned items and stocked up at holland and barrett with coconut flour and almond milk and butter.  I spent last night trawling the amazon kindle website for paleo cookbooks and I've got the 6 weeks in the smartphone so I can at least count down the days until I can eat rice again.
It's funny how the moment you think you can't have something you start to crave it almost immediately!  I'm feeling very deprived that I can't have roast potatoes on Sunday when in reality I can't remember the last time I had a roast dinner.
 At least I've discovered a fab raw fruit and nut bar called naked (so I'd have to buy it even if it wasn't good for me ;-) ) which is dairy, wheat and gluten free, there's even a chocolate (well cocoa) flavour one which I trialled today and it's yummy.  Obviously I can't live on them but as it's just dates, cashews and raisins I think I can allow them as snack/treats occasionally and they don't taste like cardboard so it's win/win!  Hurrah!
 And today as it's my last day as a modern woman I am looking forward to a pieminster pie for tea!

I bimmin' love crossfit.....

(I blimmin' hate going but I love it afterwards) and I say this as I write with a cut face, scraped palms, bruised right hip and scraped and bruised knees.  I had been feeling a little smug this week having achieved double unders and working hard on my pull ups and dips so wasn't feeling too bad about a WOD that was AMRAP 12 minutes 8 ring dips, 8 pull ups, 16 alternate lunges with (5kg) but did groan a bit at the 1km run to start (especially as the first bit is up hill (ish) ).   I stopped worrying about it when Charlie announced his warm up (our warm up is your workout.....)  30 forward bendy, hamstring exercisey things with a barbell, then 21,15 and 9 16kg american kettlebell swings/burpees and then 30 forward bendy etc...etc.. THEN the 1km run.  Now those who know me will know that I'm RUBBISH challenged at running but with all my achilles work I was hoping to get a PB of under 6mins.  It was not to be......  As I came down the hill I tripped over my feet and face/body planted into the concrete, narrowly avoiding squashing a small dog.  I managed to get up and finish the run 10 seconds over my PB grrrr.  Luckily the WOD involved the use of my palms and knees yaaay and my knees got steadily more painful throughout, but while trying to ignore the pain I did notice that the pullup and dip training in the gym has paid off and I will have to go down a band on both exercises.
The real problem was that I couldn't be too wimpy as one of the girls taking part is about to give birth!!! You heard me, I hadn't noticed she was pregnant when she had her jacket on but as we were about to start I did wonder why she had shoved a medicine ball up her top.  Luckily I noticed her bump was real BEFORE I joked about the medicine ball!  She understandably didn't do the run but did everything else despite being due in 1 week - I am sooooooo humbled.
I have been in the wars all week, as I have been continuing my BEAST sessions at the gym - I was fed up with the runninng intervals on Thursday and so decided to skip for 3 minutes instead and then do 10 double unders before starting on each set of exercises.  Skipping is fine but a double under fail results in a sharp and painful whip strike to the arm - I got lots of those and realised that I now look as if I have spent some time with Mr Grey....right upper arm is covered in whip welts.

 Not sure the skipping excuse is going to be believed so I shall be mostly wearing long sleeved tops for the foreseeable future.  I finally understand why the crossfit guys wear the silly arm sock thingys.

Glute recruitment

Ooof it's been a long, long, long, long (ok you get the drift) time since my last post which probably gives you a good idea as to how good I've been *ashamed face*.   In my defence I  haven't spent the whole time lying on the sofa living on wine, curry and after eights.  Cowes week was awesome and I ate healthier food, didn't drink myself senseless EVERY night and I even went for a run (albeit to the pub for lunch!).  Was ever so dissapointed to find that I had still managed to put on 5lbs*urgh* which weirdly disappeared a week later!???  I headed back with my tail between my legs to crossfit and of course ended up unable to walk after a week of glute recruitment - kettlebells, deadlifts, squats, lunges boom!   I love the feeling of crossfit but only immediately after the session - I do struggle to drag myself up the Gloucester Road especially when I have to cycle.  Me, bikes and traffic don't get on - by the time I get to the session my heart is beating so fast I'm almost ready to pass.  So when I have been unable to face the trek to crossfit I brought the beast back to the gym
The beast is the workout from hell - a form of interval training that leaves me crying on the floor and other gym members slightly bemused. The theory is 6 x 800m runs interspersed with alternate upper body, lower body exercises to failure.   The interval exercises range from pulls ups/dips, press ups/sit ups, kettlebell russian swings, jump squats/walking lunges, olympic squats/ power lunges, deadlifts.  I haven't managed 6 sets yet........
I have also been really, really, really, really (you get the picture) good at working on my achilles - thanks to Mobility WOD for their "rebuilding the feet" videos.   I have been doing the exercises religiously (well nearly!) and so lots and lots and lots of skipping and standing on tiptoes.  As I was really not in the mood to run on my last beast session I decided to insert skipping instead of running and after several hundred skips I even managed to do finally crack double unders (not sure why he's wearing the weird arm sock things.....) without trashing my achilles ie: I could still walk the next day!
Finally my top tip for getting out and doing some exercise - go and find something silly to do with a mate that involves running around.  My mate Murray found  2.8hours later which involved orienteering around Bristol trying to escape from zombie hordes.  Cue an evening of wandering around abandoned buildings, police cells, churches and church yards; running, sprinting, screaming, jumping over walls and ultimately being caught and infected by the zombies so that we could attend the zombie disco

Followed by a hilarious trip back home on the bus....no one wanted to sit next to me! Can't think why...

Excuses

30 June 2012

Excuses are my forte - I have withdrawn from the Bristol tri due to a mixture of a failure to do sufficient training and an injury that stopped me cramming in last minute training to make up for it!  I have rescheduled for 2 September (not in Bristol obviously - I know I'm a legend in my own mind but I have had to face up to the fact that my place in the grand scheme of things is a fairly minor one and so they weren't going to reschedule it for me so the new tri is in a lake near Cirencester).  As the physio is helping massively I have been to a spin class, been to a yoga class (bloody hell that hurt!), been for a run/walk (now that I am being re-taught how to move properly) and had two sessions with Mark.
Session1 - when I am still feeling a bit wobbly on the legs - focussed solely on the upper body and abs- the bloody TRX -I almost volunteered to just run until my legs fell off rather than do any more.  My arms were still shaking 3 hours after the session and the next day my abs hurt everytime I breathed. I told myself that no matter what my leg was doing that I'd tell Mark it was better, simply to avoid a repeat of that session - luckily John Stephenson is working marvels with the various crunching that he does.  Session 2 was horrific but in a normal way - back to cycle sprints - oh how I'd missed them - no really - well OK not at all - how to get me into a hot sweaty mess (and not in a good way) in 1 minute.  Wobbly legs on to lungy things, squatty things, squatty jumpy things, TRX press ups and rows and roll outs culminating in some obscene torture involving a dragging a ViPR along the ground while you are doing the plank and scuttling sideways like a demented crab - except this crab was swearing A LOT!
Since then I have got my bike out of chambers' basement where it has languished for 2 years! Got it serviced and the chain replaced and .............steadfastly not ridden it - seriously I've had it working for a week and everytime I plan to go out on it I have found an excuse (which has usually involved me lying down for a bit and waking up a couple of hours later) and it is just sitting in my room looking mournfully at me.  I don't know what I am so afraid of or what I think is going to happen if I get on it - obviously I am going to walk it down Park Street (very big hill for those people who don't know Bristol) because I'm just not that brave yet (and I haven't actually tested my brakes and I probably wouldn't have any left by the time I got to the bottom as I'd have had them engaged the whole time because I'm scared of going fast) see what I mean about excuses - but that's it - the end - I am going to get a grip of myself and head out tomorrow on the Bristol Bath bike path - 30 minutes out 30 minutes back and then I'm getting on a train to Portsmouth to go sailing.

PS  Managed to extend my apathy attack and stayed in bed instead of the bike ride doh!

Shameful

I am writing this while eating a beautiful lamb steak from the lovely Ruby & White butchers and the result of my first potato harvest plus a load of green things

(the green things in the picture is the paltry pea harvest so I had to supplement it with veggies from the supermarket)

It has been noted that once again there has been a 4 week gap between posts for which I should be mightily ashamed!   My sister is managing more than me and she has two children under 5 - at least one of which is a devil child

So I have been shamed into posting even though my computer is currently missing a "D" and a "space" key.   Well it's fair to say the getting thin thing hasn't been going so well - I haven't dared weigh myself (I have hidden the battery to the scales so I can't even accidentally weigh myself) but my clothes definitely haven't got any looser and the big tyre of blubber around my waist is still there.  I have pootled along unwillingly heading to the gym for the occasional swim and spin class and used physio as an excuse not to run.  I have done some sailing; on a smack (yes you heard me!)

and then around the isle of wight in the world famous round the island race

and then as I had pulled out of the Bristol tri I went to sulk in Jersey and had a go at sailing on a hobiecat.  I discovered many things - 1.  they are really fast, 2. they are really easy to capsize and 3. I am really, really, REALLY rubbish on the trapeze (and I have the massive black bruises on my arms and legs to prove it)

(what it is supposed to look like)

(what I looked like)

(what happened)

So after I hobbled back to Jersey I went back to crossfit with my tail between my legs (having taken 2 months off to train for the triathlon that never happened).  Ah! it was if I had never been away!  First session - turkish get ups with the heaviest weights we could manage for 3 reps each side (9kgs) and that was just the warm up!  Then we got down to the business of the WOD russian twists and 200m runs x 4 with weight increasing with each set from 5kg up to 12.5kg.  I swear the guys who work in the garage next door think we are all completely barking as we run up and down the road lugging various sizes of kettlebell/barbell weights. 

 

 I hardly noticed the session because I had been a big brave girl and cycled to the box (my first time on my bike for about 2 years!)  admittedly I pushed it most of the way as everytime a car came past I freaked out and had to get off.  Day 2 was an improvement and I cycled most of the way (apart from up and down the hill because I haven't quite mastered the gear thing and I hate cycling slowly up a hill while scary buses drive 2mm behind me).  The second WOD left my old lady knees in tatters, squat snatches and muscle ups.  Obviously I cannot do muscle up so I had to do double the number but pulling up from a kneeling position on the ground. Very sore knees and shoulders.  I then finished the week's exercise the following day with a spin class and headed to Wales to see my Mum and be met my sis and her demented offspring.

 

Never to do anything by halves I then squeezed in two sessions in three days with Mark from createfit and decided to brave heading outdoors for the sessions.  Being outdoors means the dreaded steps (see previous posts) and the terrible TRX. Oh the joy of doing pressups on the TRX.......  Hill sprints *shudder* and then some ingenious exercises involving park benches and swings (I shall never look at them in the same way again).  I certainly can feel the effects of ramping up my phys agenda.  Unfortunately all ruined by the next 3 days on a train travelling around the UK resulting in a diet of pizza, chocolate biscuits and muesli (although I was very proud to resist a burger king supper after a 6 hour trip from Scunthorpe)

PS  In the spirit of fairness and to avoid being banned from seeing my nieces for the foreseeable future I think I need to post a picture of Holly in her angelic state

Hamstrung

 I am the laziest person in the world and am hanging my head in shame as I type this.  I have lots of excuses - some of which are more valid than others.  It's nearly 4 weeks - FOUR WEEKS! since I last wrote.  It all started to go wrong after the long long jubilee weekend.  We had a fab fab time camping and canoeing in the rain in the Wye Valley.  My friend Murray made the most amazing homemade pork pie and I experimented with coronation chicken pies which were not too bad even though I say so myself.

 We found the most amazing campsite with a pub attached and kept out of the rain until the wee small hours being entertained by the landlord.

 The rain finally abated and we headed out onto the river in our canoes - all my workouts with Mark had prepared me for the arm and shoulder workout of 4 hours on the river (although we did have a little pub break at lunch time).  In reality the paddling wasn't very strenuous but the manhandling the canoe out of the river was.  Day2 was a bit more rainy and involved facing the rapids which was alot less terrifying than we had anticipated.

However 4 days of drinking and being damp and surrounded by people's snuffles took its toll and I went down with a lurgy that meant I had to cancel my post holiday training session.  I was so ill that I had to go out to dinner and couldn't drink!

I managed to drag myself out for a very windy weekend sailing and noticed a niggle in my right leg.  Being a typical drama queen and a bit of a hyperchondriac I had half persuaded myself I had DVT in my right calf and then as it got more and more painful possibly a ripped meniscus in my knee.  I finally decided to head to A&E when I finished a telephone hearing almost in tears because my leg hurt so much.  Knowing the NHS I went prepared for a long wait - with water, a snack and my kindle but was pleasantly surprised to be invited to hobble into an examination cubicle almost as soon as I had sat down - then I realised the one thing I hadn't prepared for was the fact that I was wearing a dress and I was going to have to have my leg waggled around into fairly compromising positions and I would have been better off packing a pair of shorts -you never know when you are going to grateful that you used those groupon vouchers to have IPL to tidy everything up. 

An injured hamstring was diagnosed and I was given drugs and told to keep it rested and iced.  After 2 days there was no real change so I then booked into MOTI for a physio appointment the next morning.  Having made sure I wore shorts this time I had my leg waggled around again and was told that my sciatic nerve was inflamed and after having bits of my spine crunched I was sent off to do some pilates.

Doldrums

Well after my massive binge I tentatively weighed myself before heading to see the beast master and was very surprised to see I had only put on half a pound (yaaaaay!). That cheered my up somewhat as I dragged my feet down to the gym wondering how on earth I was going to cope with the terrible torture that he could devise.  We started fairly inanely with a warm on the bike but just as I was getting complacent he mouthed the dreaded word "sprint" - I think you may have gathered from past posts that I HATE these with a passion - but I tend to just grit my teeth, close my eyes and pedal as fast as I can until my legs won't work.

 Unfortunately this time I reached that stage just as Mark said - well done that's 30 seconds gone.  "Whaaaaaaaat!" my head flicked up, my mouth started swearing (God knows where I got the breathe from?)  Mark just laughed as a girl walking past started backing away nervously and told me to pace myself because I had started off like a bat out of hell.  I then discovered a very important lesson which I used in the next sets - that actually keeping my eyes open and keeping the pace that I've been set makes life so much easier! (obviously it's all relative as I was still struggling to keep the bile down by the end of the session)

Then we started throwing ViPRs and kettlebells around, some pad work and the dreaded TRX to finish - except not quite - much as I had been ready to finish about 30 minutes into the session, Mark still managed to finish with his suprising horrific, because it is so short, abs torture  which ended with an extra set of medicine ball tummy tennis (my name for it not his!) just to punish me for my naughtiness while he'd been away.  Luckily I didn't have to go to work afterwards so I went for a lie down!

I have to admit I'm having a bit of a wobble at the moment - Mark asked how my tri training was going and I had to admit I haven't really found my groove - it hasn't helped that I haven't been able to run or that I haven't got my bike sorted yet so I'm only doing spin training and haven't managed more than 20 minutes on a pace session yet.  I am starting to be very nervous about July 15th and wondering if I'm going to manage it at all.  I avoided training for 2 days and then forced myself (having downloading a load of inspirational tracks for running on the advice of my buddies) to head to the gym this morning after seeing a video of my friend Charlie Martell (who is rowing the Pacific solo) talking about the fact he was having a bit of a hard time at the moment!   I ran for the first time in about 6 weeks on the treadmill at a pretty slow pace for 10 minutes and then got on the bike to do a 30 minute pace session - oh my Lord I nearly got off that bike so many times.  The little voice in my head told me that I should just give up and that I'd never manage the tri so I might as well not bother - I had a fairly serious argument with myself at the 15 minute point when I realised I had only done half of the session and I felt sick as a dog.  The lady next to me on the sit down bike pedalling fairly sedately started to look a little worried at one point. 

I managed to finish the session and then headed back to the treadmill - I had initially intended to do a 10 minute run in the brick but after 1min 20 seconds the inner voice was back, luckily my sister had recommended a song by the Vines called F*&k the World - which came on at 2 1/2 minutes and got me through to the 5 minutes I had finally negotiated with myself because I was feeling a bit nauseous and slightly wobbly.   I have persuaded myself that I shall not be despondent as at least I have run for the first time without having to hobble out of the gym and I have now managed 3/4 of the bike time/distance and half of the run time even if I looked like I had run across the Sahara when I finished it!  I have a swim tomorrow before I head off for the long long weekend and maybe I shall feel inspired when I get back from my break!

While the cat's away.......

Mark is away for the week so I have been sooooo tempted to lie in bed all day eating chocolate for breakfast and curry for tea.  My perkiness on Sunday was a little dented by spending the afternoon eating churros and hot chocolate in Quaker's Friars in the sunshine and Monday was spent in a sugar rush haze thinking about going to the gym and feeling guilty about not going (although in my defence I was a healthy, healthy creature all day (apart from a packet of giant chocolate buttons) and I did my 3 sets of ten full pressups before I went to bed.  I was supposed to go to a spin class this morning before heading to Birmingham but decided I would be cutting it too fine so I packed my swim kit with the sworn intention of doing my catch up swim session that Mark had kindly emailed to me, when I got back from Brum.

I had planned to avoid my weigh in today as I didn't want to get discouraged but I forced myself to face the music and to my surprise my scales appear to be behaving themselves after the battery removal lesson and told me I have lost another 3 lbs!  Cue more dancing round the room in my pants but only for a very short time as I had to be a grown up and get to court on time.  I have also lost another inch off my hips and waist and half an inch off thighs and arms so my step was decidedly light (see what I did there?) as I headed off to the train station with my healthy packed breakfast, lunch and snack.    Oh boy do I come up with some excuses when I don't want to exercise, I got back and was sooooo tired that I almost convinced myself that I should just go home but I couldn't let the buzz I got from my scales encounter this morning go to waste so I headed to the pool and started my session.  It's not quite the same without Mark noting down the lap times but I managed to finish the session and was pretty proud of myself that I did it in half an hour without dying albeit feeling a little wobbly as I got out - I should have realised that something was wrong and of course when I got home I checked the session and realised that I had only done half of it, but hey I did 30 more minutes hard swimming than I thought I would have done today and weirdly was decidedly less tired than when I got in the pool.

 I was very proud of myself for all the planning I've been doing for my travelling food - yogurt and passionfruit for brekkie today, with roast salmon and veggies with couscous for lunch and turkey chilli and basmati rice with roast veggies for dinner this evening with strawberries for dessert.  Roasted more veggies and salmon and prepared couscous to take to Nottingham for lunch tomorrow and made up another yogurt and passionfruit for brekkie although this time I added a teaspoon of honey as it was really sharp this morning.  Should have enough roast veg and rice for dinner tomorrow night and will just add something pot luck from the freezer.  30 pressups before bedtime and I have been the best behaved healthy person ever!

Post Script - after this post I have had a totally alcohol fuelled week few days, inovlving rum, boats, boys, swimming (what time do you think I went??), embarrassing texts and a wedding - resulting in me eating chinese takeaway, fat boy brekkie, mcdonalds and half of a roast pig.  I thought that at least giving blood would mean I could dare to weigh myself because I would be weigh a pint less than I did before donating but they couldn't get into a vein so I came back punctured but with still the same volume of blood inside me (I had been a bit concerned I would be rejected because there wasn't enough blood in my blood but I passed that test surprisingly).  Now I am just quaking with fear cos the cat's back tomorrow and I think I may suffer.........

If music be the food of love....

I really need to sort out the music on my ipod.  I managed to hop chirpily out of bed and down to the gym for my bike/run brick.  My plan was for a 20 minute cadence bike and 10 minute run/jog.  The bike was going well and by putting up the resistence a little I managed to knock another 15 seconds off my 10km time, albeit leaving me breathless and dripping in sweat (such a nice mental picture huh? imagine what it was like for the people who actually saw it!)

 I had struggled a bit towards the end because all the music that shuffle put up was techno chill-out which isn't really conducive to pedalling like mad when you'd rather be eating eggs benedict on a sofa reading the Sunday times style supplement.  But that was nothing with the struggle I had when I started the run/jog.  I just couldn't find anything to keep me going - not helped by the fact that I seem to hold my breathe everytime I pressed the forward button on the ipod so after about 15 attempts to find something vaguely inspiring or even just simply upbeat I was wheezing like a warthog amid the odd expletive that was meant to be in my head but spilled out causing my exercise neighbours to look at me nervously (large, red, sweaty lady keeps shouting out swear words while running very slowly on a treadmill hmmm) and then I lost my temper, pressed the stop button and did my best to stomp off while my legs did bambi impressions.  I managed 1minute 38 seconds! *sigh*

So to regain some self-respect I did 3 sets of 10 full press ups (yaaay!) - although the 3rd set were interspersed with a couple of little rests stretches and then 3 sets of Mark Durnford's horrid abs torture exercises (med ball crunches - and yes Mark I did use the heavy one - russian twists with the med ball and swiss ball mountain climbers) and I didn't swear once (well not out loud) although I did notice that the lady who had been next to me on the treadmill made sure she was on the furthest mat away from me  - but she could only do press ups on her knees so she left mwah ha ha ha ha

 PS I cannot do this!

Spinning and Wakes

There is a God!  My scales have obviously learned their lesson and recorded that I had lost some weight even if it is only a teeny tiny bit (I know that weight can go down as well as up but unlike the economy a downward trend is what I am looking for).  This joyful news spurred me on to head to my spinning class rather than snaffle an extra hour in bed.  I was going to go straight to Birmingham and then onto London so I had to drag a bag of work, clothes and general stuff with me although there was definitely a spring in my step which is unusual at that time in the morning. 

Serendipity is a great thing so while I was panting away on the bike looking hopelessly at the clock ticking painfully slowly, I was dragged out of the place that my mind goes when the physical exertion gets too much, by the instructor saying that we were on the last track - no I hadn't become delerious again....the class that I thought was 45 minutes was only (ONLY!) half an hour - oh the joy - if I could do a back flip I would have done one off the bike but instead I just busted my ass on the last track and poured my sweaty mass into the shower. 

Now despite the fact that I had vowed after the weekend's debauchery not to drink for the rest of the week I ended up at my friend Madhu's house (well her sister's house) being fed wine and amazing home cooked Indian food - I couldn't refuse as it would have been churlish - honest!  So I rolled out of Rajni's house  to prepare myself for the memorial service of our friend Marie Colvin the following day.

  I had every intention of going home the evening after the memorial so I could have week 5 of Hell Thursday but it was an empty intention because in reality there was no way I was going to do anything other than get mind splatteringly drunk, which is what I did - and I had a kebab to round it all off!  Not even the green dress inspiration was going to have any effect on that inevitability.  It was an amazing service and slightly surreal to see so many politicians and journalists wandering around - only Marie could have had Cerys Matthews singing "Blowing in the Wind" at her memorial and I have to say that had me in tatters.  Her sailing buddies headed off to the pub and as my friend Madhu said in her wisdon " get a bunch of sailors together for a wake and the next day is never going to be pretty."  (and it wasn't)

So I missed my week 5 swim, and had to head back to Bristol, pick up a case, repack and head to Manchester for work.  I think I must at least get some brownie points for booking a hotel with a gym although I didn't actually set foot in it - ah those good intentions again! I spent the evening prepping my case, while drinking buckets of water and trying to work out how to get the aircon working in my sweltering room and then the next day in court and travelling back to Bristol.  Again I had intended to get back and go swimming or to a spin class but the only thing I did before I went to bed was to sleepily change the sheets while stepping over piles of sailing gear, clothes, towels, suitcases and papers.  

So Saturday was supposed to be the re-start of my programme but my apathy attack has continued although I did manage to sort out the admin explosion in my flat, do my laundry and to do a whole load of gardening that was long overdue.  I have strawberries and mint planted in hanging baskets, peas planted out, potatoes shored up, carrots thinned out and loads of sweet peas potted - not sure how that will help me fit in my green dress but it was food for the soul. 

Now I have clean sports kit I have no excuse not to go to the gym tomorrow for some biking and running (time to see if my achilles can cope with a slow, flat jog! fingers crossed).

The truth hurts....literally

I think I'm delerious, I've just realised that I've walked out of the gym with one of their towels although walked may be an overexaggeration.  NEVER and I mean NEVER EVER EVER tell your trainer that you've been on the piss all weekend just before you start your training session.
Cycle sprint intervals (on the third one I was tactically working out the best place for me to chunder and I would ask for some credit that at no stage did I contemplate turning right to aim my projectile at the evil sweat-meister as he stood cackling with sadistic laughter at my panting).  I managed to keep the bile down and survive that tiny hell session and then moved onto ViPR, kettlebells, pressups, squats, tricep dips, bicep curls and some one arm rows with the biggest kettlebells I'd ever seen - I could hardly lift them up with both hands never mind one arm - I think I'm getting Stockholm syndrome because when Mark allowed me to only do 10 in the second set rahter than curse him under my breathe, I was pathetically grateful and thought what a nice man he is.  Then we finished off with some ab torture that I would officially describe as "horrid" and still managed to include the ViPR, a medicine ball and a swiss ball - I can't go into any further description or I'll get flashbacks and won't be able to sleep.  I couldn't even hand over the cash to the man in Waitrose for my healthy soup without my hands shaking like a junkie (although it may still be the dt's from the weekend's boozing).  I have now consumed 2 litres of water and the shaking has stopped but I'm supposed to be doing a spin session at a ridiculous time tomorrow morning but I'm not convinced that the sight of a bike isn't going to send my into a hysterical breakdown - so maybe for the good of everyone I should just get an extra hour in bed instead........?

Boats and Kettlebells

Can you throw up under water?  I thought I was going to find out on session 5 of hell Thursday.  It wasn't helped by the fact that I had overslept and so turned up 10 minutes late.  You have no idea how tempted I was just to stay in bed and apologise for missing the session, but I reckoned I would be made to pay -either in my training session or in the final swim session, the risk wasn't worth it so I scampered down the street towards the gym, streaming various items of clothing behind me as I tried to get dressed on the move.   Mark's response to my tardiness was "Well you should get some good swim times in if you've had extra sleep" *groan.*  I think I managed to elicit a mild expression of being impressed from Mark when I managed to do my swim sets in the same time each time, but I did knock one set off each block just so that I didn't expire in the pool.  Shall have to work on my pull in preparation for this tri and before everyone gets excited I'm talking about my arms under the water!

I actually had to go to work after the session and spent the rest of the day in an oxygen deprived haze, trying to focus on the mechanics of car accidents.  Friday's brick session had to be cancelled as I had to head to Coventry with a big bag of sailing gear for what turned out to be a mammoth day in court - despite my optimistic hopes that I would be on a train to Southampton by 1330 - I finally got a train at 1830 and had a healthy train buffet supper of bbq hula hoops, beef jerky and a caramel chunky kitkat.  I did however manage not to succumb to the temptation of a mini bottle of wine so I was still in a fit state to put up the tent when I got to Lymington and my eternal thanks to Lisa for picking me up from the station.  It was at this stage that my good intentions fell into tatters as I met everyone in the pub and I was forced, yes forced, to have a large glass of wine, which seemed to multiply and then ended up with us on the boat drinking bizarre mixtures of alcohol and mixers - bacardi and ginger beer anyone??

I managed not to get back to the tent so slept on the boat and was awoken to get a bacon buttie and a bloody mary from the haven cafe/restaurant.  The REYC were having a feeder race in the morning so that the first 3 boats could be chosen to race against the Royal Lymington Yacht Club in the afternoon.  As Ilex managed not to even start the race on time we were gobsmacked pleased to manage to catch up so that we qualified. Actually we weren't pleased at all as most of us were so hungover that we had been looking forward to an afternoon nap before we started drinking again at the post regatta dinner.   The REYC's new yacht Right Royal of Upnor performed outstandingly in the first race and did so again in the afternoon much to the pride of all (especially those who had put so much effort into getting her purchased).  My memories of the race involve headaches, confusion between port and starboard and having a mouth so dry that I was expecting sand to start billowing out.

                                                                                                           Right Royal went off like a rocket and despite the lethargy levels on the boat, we did enough not to let the other boats down.  We were all elated to be told at the Yacht Club drinks that for the first time in many many years the REYC had won the trophy!  The evening went down hill from there into a drunken haze and many hangovers on Sunday morning.                                                                 

Wales and weighing scales

The weather for our epic weekend looked as if it was about to break and turn into a very windy, downpour kind of day so we decided to sack our original idea of hiring mountain bikes to do the trail around the Usk Reservoir and walk it instead.  I have to confess to being a teeny weeny bit relieved about that decision because the cycle to and from the trail was incredibly hilly to the extent I'd already told Liz that I was walking up one of them - it was virtually impossible in a car never mind a bike!  Anyway while the wind had kicked in, the rain hadn't so I set off on our 5.5 mile walk reassured that at least the walk would be flat!  It was very pretty and I was very tempted to have a dip but there were millions (yes millions) of signs in both English and Welsh threatening anyone who dared to enter the water with many deaths - so I decided against it. 

I discovered to my disgust that there were some bits that were NOT FLAT - it was at this stage obviously that I thanked my lucky stars I had put on a thermal vest, a fleece, a waterproof as well as a fleece neck warmer and sealskin hat!  Yaay.  Luckily the not flat bits were in no way comparable to the ones I had endured the day before so I had to man up and think of England/Wales (delete as appropriate).  I took some pretty pictures to while away the time

As we finished our walk the first drops of rain started to fall so we hopped in the car and went to find the nearest cafe- we found a lovely place which was a converted old school room which served a fab cream tea with enormous warm scones hurrah!  That served as lunch and we headed back to Bristol where I had a lie down.

It's funny how you get to see how people's minds work and Mark, my personal trainer is no exception.  When I got up on Tuesday morning for my training session I could hardly walk and so despite the sun shining I had to concede we would probably have to stay indoors as I couldn't run.  I explained what a good girl I'd been and how active I had been over the weekend and he nodded and then, like the smiling assassin he is, put me through the hardest bloody session I've ever had without me having to engage my achilles once.  All I can say is that the words "cycle sprint intervals" and "kettlebell step ups" will forever send a shiver down my spine!

I made the rookie mistake of telling him about the green dress motivation which he is now threatening to hold over me at every opportunity (at least it's better than the wall bars revelation - see "Picking Up the Brass" by Eddie Nugent, to get that reference).  The green dress motivation is that I own a fairly stunning green sequinned backless dress which I want to fit into by August.  I have fitted into it in the past and know exactly how much I need to lose to be able to fit into it again.  Due to its backlessness(?) there is no room for lycra suck-in tummy pants so I will either have to lose a fairly significant amount of lard or have some emergency liposuction on 31st July.

Having given him so much ammo, Mark moved onto the TRX and some sadistic negotiations which involved me having to chose between 2 equally horrific options of pressups (he seemed to be suggesting he was being kind to me) Hmmm.  He then finished off with some horrific abs/medicine ball concoction that nearly made me throw up (I was past the crying stage!)  Needless to say I had to have a lie down for the rest of the day and then when I tried to move found that I couldn't .....not any part of my body....literally everything hurt!  I had intended to swim the following day but was in too much pain to even leave the flat (apart from to get a very small bar of chocolate :-D....just kidding).  I was monumentally disappointed to find that I hadn't lost any weight so I kicked the scales and took the batteries out hoping that would teach it a lesson for the next time.