Silence is Golden?

Having broken my record for number of crossfit sessions attended in a week I turned off the alarm on Saturday and went back to bed.  I had an appointment with James Jowsey , sports therapist on Sunday and as he only had an hour he couldn't deal with all the wonky bits of my body.  We settled for just the achilles as I've been hobbling for a week after trying to crack double unders in last week's open session.  After an hour and a bit of performing weird and wonderful movements and being videoed, so I wouldn't forget my exercises, (I began to wonder whether I was actually on some kind of reality show to see how many daft things someone will do until they call it a day) I found myself  banned from running, jumping,skipping and hopping, which under normal circumstances would have me jumping clapping for joy.   However taking into account the limitations of my shoulder that pretty much leaves me with situps, squats and lunges (my butt is aching just thinking about it).  I am also allowed to do knock-kneed star jumps which make me look quite special!  Apparently I have very stretchy calves which have no power and therefore tug on the achilles everytime I try to do anything requiring bounce.
 Monday morning I headed to the box armed with my video.  I couldn't do the strength session of handstand push ups (even scaled on the box hurt too much) so I went back to turkish getups with a shoe (another way to look special, but it's supposed to be be rehab for my shoulder)  I felt pretty idiotic especially as I watched some of the girls perform amazing feats (Nina and Janine were down to 3 pads and one of the other girls managed 3 full HSPUs!)  Hmm I struggle even getting into a handstand (and that was before the shoulder injury!)
However I had no excuse not to do the WOD "Silence" - 5 rounds 1 minute pull ups, 1 minute burpees (bleurgh), 1 minute sumo deadlift high pulls 1 minute rest.  While I can manage about 3 pull ups with a green band I went with a blue because the shoulder was grumpy and also because I planned on doing more than 3 in the minute (I averaged 11 so I think I probably scaled it about right), burpees (lets not talk about those) and I kept the sumos under 20kg as the high pull was aggravating (to the shoulder not me).  For a 20 minute workout it really was pretty hard, but this evening after icing my shoulder and taking some ibuprofen it isn't as annoyed as I thought it would be, so I think despite feeling a little bit lame with having to keep weights low, I think I am scaling it right.
All in all it's been a bit of a crap week and that coinciding with raging hormones means I have fallen off the paleo wagon in style - curry, rice, naan bread, chocolate cake.  As I'd gone that far I finished it off with a whisky.  Bleurgh I haven't felt so ill from food in a very long time and to cap it all off I woke up, having slept oddly, with a trapped nerve in my neck.  Luckily I had a lunchtime crossfit session and so a combination of ice and ibuprofen meant that I could move it by the time I got to the box.  What a cracker today - warmed up with my knock-kneed, pigeon toed star jumps and then moved onto max time chair sits (boxes not rings) 65 seconds, 1km row for time 4 mins 20 secs, and then a team WOD involving a log (3 rounds for time 30 squats and 30 over and unders)  I had proper bambi legs after that one!

Having been brought up a Catholic I still am subject to feelings of guilt and so I have vowed to be paleo (apart from dairy because I had cream and ricotta in the fridge) for the rest of the week to try and get rid of the blubber I seem to be piling on again.  Don't get me wrong I really enjoy Paleo/Wholefood when I'm on it, but it does require a great deal of preparation; a large fridge and freezer, LOTS of tupperware, a hand blender, a food processor, a slow cooker and a mandolin.  So I decided to do some prep, I grated white and red cabbages, carrots and apple and them made mayo so I have 3 flavours of coleslaw (smokey paprika, curry and normal), then I roasted a pumpkin and a butternut squash I had hanging around and pureed the flesh and froze it in batches and then I made a sugar free meringue with the egg white left over from the mayo (to be eaten with whipped cream and blueberries).  Once I've got some guacamole and grated carrot salad I'll be back on track.   I'm even going to  slow cook a shoulder of pork with apple and ginger tomorrow so I have pulled pork to keep me away from the curry house.

I must I must...

I have said it before and I'll say it again - I'm sure exercise isn't good for you!!  Now I'm attempting to kick the apathy and I've had a quiet time at work I've kicked the arse out of crossfit this week.  4 days in a row and now I can't move (OK I'm exaggerating, I can move my eyelids).  Tuesday's WOD seemed fairly innocuous - 10 mins of  5 powercleans on the minute  and a 7 minute AMRAP of 7 thrusters and 35 doubleunders.  I scaled everything so as not to annoy the temperamental shoulder and concentrated on technique (getting the elbows through quickly and killing the elves (thanks Andrew for that one!)) and I did front squats instead of thrusters - light and low, and 110 skips instead of doubleunders.  So far so good.  I didn't feel too bad after that and so I blithely went along to Wednesday's class (I should have known it would be too good to last!)

50 40 30 20 10 russian swings and press ups.  I did some light and low back squat strength work first and then went light (12kg) with the swings and did the press ups off a (very tall) box to avoid the crappy form you get when you do them on your knees (thanks James for that one! I think...)  It was horrible.  I really didn't think your boobs could hurt after a workout but they did (and still do!).  However I remind myself that pressups make your boobs perky and now I can even make them jiggle if I tense my muscles (not sure exactly which muscles I've been tensing because to be honest I was trying to locate my lats and found my boobs doing a little dance).  
I didn't even think I had lats until James made us use a foam roller on them pre-workout and oh boy did I find them!   *sigh* yet another area of pain to add to the collection, good thing I don't appear to use them much.  For those who don't know, the lats are the ones on your back that when well-developed seem to spread out like wings (who needs red bull huh?)
 and give you a V shaped body.  (See photo of strange man wearing a fishing hat to do pullups.  Personally I think the 'lat look' as I am now going to call it, looks far more attractive on the lovely Kirsty - modelling the perfect painface during Tribal Clash).

My triceps are producing some exquisite agony too, which is proving embarrassing when I'm in public as I emit pathetic little pain noises every time I move my arms.  The answer to that was obviously to go to bed and stay there for a week with a big bar of chocolate keep going to crossfit and so Thursday was pull ups and turkish get ups day.  I know! perfect for a dodgy shoulder, but actually Coach Hulk Grogan showed my that now I can actually raise my arms over my head that I could do pull ups again and I didn't need to use every band in the box to achieve it.

He did look askance at me as I trundled to the rig with the two thickest bands that there were and then found that I almost catapulted myself out of the door using them.  I worked back down to a green which is where I was before my shoulder decided to take a sabbatical, so I did a little dance in my head (mainly because the rest of my body hurts too much to actually do a dance, little or otherwise).  Then we went for the WOD and I did my turkish getups with a shoe (yes you read that right!) because doing them with a shoe balanced on your palm is perfect rehab for a dodgy shoulder (thanks again James) (I did the other arm with 8kg, which is marginally pathetic, but I have a little bit of fear (not wholly irrational) about dropping a 12kg kettlebell on my head!
By this time I really was hurting....EVERYWHERE, but as I'd managed 3 sessions I thought I'd go for a record (for me) of 4 sessions in a week and as it was Friday 13th it would have been cowardly/superstitious to back out - bl&%dy hell I wish I had.  30 burpees, 40 wall balls, 50 double unders FOUR TIMEs, even reading it is horrific.   I negotiated 150 skips instead of double unders as I'm still hobbling after Sunday's attempt at mastering them and used a pitiful 3kg wall ball to the 9m mark (because I'm a hobbit!)  Even so it was truly revolting.

 I got to three rounds with 5 minutes to go on the 30 minute cut off time so I had to start (and unfortunately finish) the 4th round and every single burpee made me want to vomit.  At least I have learnt a couple of things - I should be putting flat palms rather than fingertip spider hands on the ground when I burpee (that might explain some of my shoulder problems!) and I think I might have found my wall ball technique (but don't tell anyone as I might have to start increasing the ball weight if they find out).  A strange bloke from the surrounding garages/workshops gave me a high five salute as I walked out of the box drenched in sweat and glowing like a tomato - I guess he must be impressed that a fat bird can do burpees ;-)

Box life

Sooo now the excitement of the Tribal Clash is over I am trying to quash the apathy attacks and the sugar demon and get back to my cavegirl lifestyle.  I have a little time before I'm back on whole30 but I don't want to blow it and I have been kicking the arse out of my dirty chocolate habit recently.  Luckily cavolo nero is back in the shops and as the weather has got a little chillier I have been able to indulge my meatball fetish (amazing with some smoked paprika and ground cumin).

 Despite being on remedials with my shoulder impingement and being told to properly ease off so I can relearn how to recruit my shoulder muscles I have had to knuckle down and stop avoiding the box.  I have no excuse as the coaches are more than happy to come up with new and fiendish alternatives to any of the exercises in the WODs that are not shoulder friendly so I can still stagger out of the box feeling as if I've been hit by a truck.

And that is how I was introduced to Santora; 3 sets of  5 x 1minute workouts with a minute to rest in between each set.  Even with my bespoke workout I still thought I might throw up at the end.  1 minute air squats, 1 minute shuttle runs, 1 minute deadlifts (60kg), 1 minute box jumps, 1 minute toes to wall (abs) - bleurgh - I was struggling to walk/move the next day.  Trying to run after a minute of airsquats is a bit like trying to run after you've spun around a broomstick 20 times - your legs just won't go in the same direction!
I took a few days off with another apathy attack and then headed to the open session on Sunday for some double under practice and a 20 minute deadlift and toes to wall WOD.  My achilles have been on fire ever since but I have had a little spark of fitness impetus and so have dragged (literally) my sorry ass to the box for more punishment this week while keeping the weight low and concentrating on my technique so I don't irritate the grumpy shoulder.  One day I'm sure I'll find it less difficult to motivate myself, and the apathy attacks will diminish.  Until then I shall just have to rely on peer pressure and the odd moments of self-loathing to keep me going.  At least I have cavolo nero and meatballs (and the odd compliment on my weight loss) to keep my spirits up.

The Tribe

Wow I'm feeling so inspired after an amazing weekend on the beach in Devon.  The Tribal Clash was immense - 100 teams from all over the country and a truly beautiful location.  Crossfit Avon had 5 teams entered (two of which were Masters teams).  The WODs were incredibly hardcore and while a teeny part of me would have loved to be part of the competition, the rest of me was relieved not be sweating blood and tears in the sunshine on the beach.  I did lose my voice cheering and screaming the teams on through their pain and exertion.  The sun shone the whole weekend and the Dartmouth regatta provided the backdrop to the spectacle.
The crossfit Avon camp (competitors and followers) was hard to miss, especially because of the yellow team t-shirts designed by the gorgeous Jules Hawkins.
 It was lovely to spend the evening around a fire pit, cooking clean food with the Avon family, with Dom's tunes banging out and Simon and Katriona mending the competitors after their exhausting day (I don't think I've ever seen so much rock tape!).  I was especially in awe of Cathy Smith who completed the second day with a broken rib.  All in all it was an awe-inspiring weekend (and not just
because of the topless men with their six-packs).



I was very proud to be part of the Avon 'yellow army' that weekend - where one of our teams got to the final and one of our Masters teams won the Masters' competition.  Very much looking forward to next year.

Cavegirl in the kitchen

As I no longer have the use of my arms or legs after Tuesday and Wednesday's WODs (and my shoulder is distinctly unhappy, so I am heeding the physio's advice and slacking off the Crossfit) I thought I would prepare for the weekend's camping at Tribal Clash.  We will be camped by the beach on Blackpool Sands near Dartmouth  with 100 Crossfit teams (hopefully crammed full of hotties!) and as I have been inspired by last weekend's camping trip I headed off to purchase a camping stove, table and other camping accessories.  As I everyone is likely to be fairly hardcore healthy I thought I had better play along.

 Soooo here is what a cavegirl takes camping:  Chicken kebabs from Sainsburys (or any other supermarket, or make your own), I can fry them on the stove and eat them with grated carrot salad, guacamole and courgette fritters.   I have bacon and eggs that I can fry for brekkie with a courgette fritter and readymade kofta kebabs that I can have for lunch with some homemade mayo, carrot salad and guacamole.  Supper on Saturday will be Ruby & White's awesome hamburgers with carrot salad and guacamole and fritters.  Same brekkie and lunch on Sunday as Saturday.  I am going to take some greek yogurt and blueberries along for sweet snacks along with some almonds.  I might also take some pork scratchings from the fab Mexican shop in Clifton - they are fully gluten free with no additives and they are a brilliant paleo alternative to crisps.
As will be very obvious the staples of my travelling menu are carrot salad, guacamole and courgette fritters.

 Carrot salad (this costs about 50p, maybe £1 with the olive oil and lemon juice)
4 carrots grated (I have a food processor and along with my hand blender, mandolin and slow cooker, it is a paleo necessity) - mixed with a big, big glug (no add a bit more) of your favourite extra virgin olive oil, salt, pepper, toasted cumin seeds, half a lemon or lime, maybe some crushed garlic and grated ginger if you fancy it.  That's it!  It really is beautifully sweet and fresh and I don't tire of it.

Guacamole
There are loads of different ways of making guacamole and mine often depends on what is in the fridge, but with my food processor I can make it in a few minutes.  As it is so quick to make I only make small batches unless I am feeding more than me.   Blitz half a red onion and then soak in water for a few minutes so it isn't so tangy on the breathe (I often don't bother doing this if I'm by myself and there are no hotties around), then put onion (without water) back in the processor with a tomato (or about 4 cherry tomatoes), half a finely chopped chilli (or chilli flakes if you don't have fresh), salt and pepper, juice of half a lime (or lemon), 1 avocado without skin or stone.  Blitz. Eat.

Courgette Fritters
These take a little longer to make as I make them in larger batches and I only have a very small non-stick frying pan [note to self, get bigger non-stick frying pan].  I grate 1 or 2 courgettes, mix with 2 eggs and a cup of almond flour or a couple of tablespoons of coconut flout.  Season to taste - I like spiciness so I add smoked paprika, salt and pepper, chilli flakes and freshly ground cumin.  Then I fry dollops in coconut oil for a couple of minutes on each side, squishing them flat to make sure they cook through.

One other thing that is a joy to eat is homemade mayonnaise and it's absolutely encouraged on both paleo and wholefood 30.  I have found a really quick way to make it that avoids the endless drizzling but you need a hand blender.  Check this video for the full instructions, but basically you get the hand blender beaker and add an egg yolk, 1tbsp water, 1 cup olive oil (not extra virgin as it's too strong, you could use avocado or walnut oil - don't use canola or other bad oils), salt and pepper (I add a bit of mustard and juice of 1/4-1/2 lemon)  Then put the blender in the beaker to the bottom and turn it on.  Mayonnaise appears before your eyes - keep going until you have a beaker of mayo.  Should take less than 2 minutes.  You can add flavourings such as garlic for aioli or a dash of smoked paprika or some chopped capers or anything really that suits your taste.

Oooooosh!

I know, I know, it's been aaaaages. I am a bad person.  However I have been a busy bee trying to shed some lard!  I started wholefood30 having been inspired by the lovely Stubz who has lost about 6 stone doing wholefood for various periods of time - he's just started 120 days which is amazing.  Wholefood 30 is strict paleo; no grains, no dairy, no legumes, no soy, no sugar, no alcohol.   I know- NO ALCOHOL!  Oh my goodness it was hard, but I was horrified about how huge I looked in photographs from a weekend in Snowdon so I kept at it...AND I lost a stone (with a little help from a colonic!)
However after my first, ever festival and Cowes Week and no Crossfit for 3 weeks I have piled on a bit (not sure how much as I've been to scared to step on the scales).  Therefore I am going to do a mini wholefood until I go sailing with my Sandhurst girlies (no way I will manage avoiding the wine that weekend!).  I've also  got some friends who are looking at paleo/wholefood so I shall be posting the recipes that help keep me away from the cake aisle in Sainsbury's.
I've just come back from bog snorkelling in Wales and as you can see from the photo I've been wasting away ;-)

I spent the weekend with the lovely Nina and the fabulous couple Jules and Rich.  Jules is on a ketogenic (no carb) diet and appears to be thriving so apart from the booze my diet was pretty healthy.  Nina produced some fabulous sweet potato fritters which are a great mini carb boost for post-training energy dips.


Sweet potato fritters (should make 4 or 5)
1 sweet potato grated, 2 eggs, 2 tablespoons coconut flour plus seasoning (I use salt, pepper, freshly ground cumin, smoked paprika, some chilli flakes.  Mash it all up and fry in coconut oil for about three minutes on each side.  Super duper - we had them with half an avocado and a fried egg for breakfast.

As well as being a good girl in the kitchen (I've just whipped up a batch of courgette fritters to take away camping for next weekend) I have dragged myself back to crossfit.  Oh my goodness I currently can't move my arms from doing Fran but with ring rows instead of pull ups (my rotator cuff is still not healed).  Today's WOD was totally bonkers and I expect I won't be able to walk tomorrow - 7 minute AMRAP 8 russian swings and 24 double unders, followed by 3 x400m runs with 60 seconds in between, followed by 7 minute AMRAP 10 wall balls 10 box jumps.  Filthy...really!

Posh gyms don't sweat

Bloody hell!  I can't believe how long it's been since my last post.  Bad Bridget!  But it's been a whirlwind of activity. In the week running up to the European Masters I couldn't do any last minute panic training at the box because I was in Macclesfield on a case.  So I pack my PE kit and my skipping rope and downloaded a tabata timer onto my phone.  The gym had no free weights and loads of weird machines for working on one muscle at a time BUT there were kettlebells although bugger all space to use them (maybe they were just there for show?!)   So I did some skipping to warm up, which caused some consternation and then did a kettlebell Tabata which caused more consternation - I don't think they'd ever seen anyone sweat before!  Then I tried a power lunge/pressup WOD and finished my whole workout in 30 minutes.  Day 2 I found a barbell and worked on my clean technique - a girl sat down onto a weird thigh squeezing machine and carefully draped her long blonde hair over the back of the seat, then sat there for about 5 minutes checking herself out in the mirror before doing 10 squeezes and then a bit more mirror gazing....and no one batted an eyelid, while they looked at me as if I was a freak!
Soooo the work managed to take my mind off my nerves about the Raising the Bar competition and I suddenly found myself cooking a paleo breakfast pie  and packing all kinds of paleo treats for the next day...THE NEXT DAY aaaaggh! The only solution was chocolate (probably not the best preparation for a day of intense physical activity).   However the crazy early start and the 30 minute walk to the box was great preparation, at least it woke me up and took my mind off the impending ordeal.   The lovely Cathie Smith was competing alongside me and drove us to Dragon Crossfit in Cardiff along with her daughter and son and his friend who were acting as cheerleaders for the day.  The box was buzzing when we arrived and we met up with the dashing Hugh Thomas who was the third Master from Crossfit Avon

We got marked up with our numbers and wandered nervously around checking out the opposition.  I have to say I was ready to call for a stewards' inquiry into the age of some of the girls as I was hard pushed to believe some of them were over 40.  I jealously watched the tiny pert bottoms and the six pack abs and wondered what the hell I was doing there, but then the boys started taking their tops off and all was well with the world :-D.

The first WOD was a clean ladder, girls first and the weights looked epic, the over 55s started and it was truly inspiring to see ladies in their 60s and 70s with the most amazing figures shifting weights that I couldn't manage (well actually that bit was a bit humiliating!).  I managed 35kg which is fairly rubbish and was the joint lowest lifted in our age category although I  managed to do more bar hops in the tie breaker so I didn't finish last.  Some of the weights lifted were enormous and Cathie got a great personal best lift at 60kg.  I just had to make a vow to work on my oly lifting technique.

WOD 2 (50kg deadlifts followed by burpee barbell hops)was horrific and left me gasping so badly that I thought I'd bruised my lungs - I couldn't stop wheezing for an hour.  My thanks to Amelia who shouted at me so loudly to make me get over the bar exactly at the cut off point so I could earn another 2 minutes.

Then WOD 3 left me having to have a serious word with myself as my bottom lip started to wobble at the prospect of shoulders to overhead with a weight that I just couldn't lift, followed by box step ups with a 10kg plate.  I hate being a hobbit - that box was soooooo high.

 Luckily the lovely coach Caz gave me a pep talk and I pulled myself together and scaled the weight so I could complete the workout.  Unsurprisingly I didn't make the semi-finals but I didn't finish last (read into that what you will!)  and I got to watch some truly inspiring women (and men) workout for the rest of the day.  I avoided semi-permanent disability by warming down on a bike and went home for a very warm shower and a very long sleep with the intention of doing loads more training and coming back next year.